Looking up "Love" in God's dictionary. (5)

Blogs to be read first: Welcome, Too Much, Too Soon (1), Too Much Icing, Too Little Cake (2), DEFECT! (3), A Whole New World [er, Attitude] (4)

What is love?

Many of us good Christians will spit out 1 Corinthians 13, the "Love Chapter," but this particular chapter in the Bible has more significance than probably many of us every realized. Paul, the author of 1 and 2 Corinthians, wrote about God's love to the people there, and that was the equivalent of writing a letter on family values to Hollywood today. Corinthian was synonymous with immorality.

*Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. (1 Cor. 13:4)*

"How could these people possibly understand the true meaning of the statement 'God is love' (1 John 4:16) when on every street corner and from every brothel someone offered their version of "love" - sensual pleasure - to them?" asks author, Joshua Harris.

*It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. (1 Cor. 13:5)*

Would they - will WE - choose everlasting or fleeting pleasure? The world today is the same as it was in Paul's day. It screams at us from newspapers, magazines, billboards, and movies: "Love is sex...Sex is plasure...Pleasure is all that matters."

*Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13:6-8)*

~t~h~i~n~k~~a~b~o~u~t~~i~t~~

John 13:34 gives us the pattern for true love: "As I [Jesus] have loved you, so you must love one another." As Christians, we are to model God's love to the empty and lost world.

Josh says, "People watch us, and what they see affects God's reputation for loving His creation. If we claim to follow Christ then wear the world's twisted style of love, we drag the name and character of our Lord in the dirt."

Are you dragging Jesus in the dirt?

As I've mentioned in the previous chapters, the world's version of love is all about pleasing me. What can I get out of it? We're also told that love is a feeling.

The song, "Hooked on a Feeling" popped into my head right now. It clearly describes the world's definition of love:

"I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me...I'm hooked on a feeling, I'm high on believing, that you're in love with me."

On the topic, Harris says, "Our feelings by themselves don't do others one bit of good. If a man feels love for the poor but never gives money to help them or never shows kindness to them, what are his feelings worth? They may benefit him, but if his actions don't communicate love, his feelings mean nothing...By inflating the importance of feelings, we neglect the importance of putting love into action."

We're also told that love is beyond our control. We say, "I fell in love," or "We're madly in love." Do you realize you're comparing love to a pit or a mental disorder? We say this because it removes personal responsibility.

The popular Alicia Keys song, "Fallin'" describes this pattern of thinking oh-too-well:

I keep on fallin' in and out of love with you
Sometimes I love you
Sometimes you make me blue
Sometimes I feel good
At times I feel used
Loving you darling
Makes me so confused

I keep on fallin' in and out of love with you
I never loved someone the way that I loved you
Oh, Oh, I never felt this way
How do you give me so much pleasure
And cause me so much pain, yea yea
'Cause when I think
I'm taking more than would a fool
And I start fallin' back in love with you

It all sounds so true though, doesn't it? That's because it's all the world tells us - that we can't help it, that we have no control.


I love the way Josh Harris puts this:

"The world takes us to a silver screen on which flickering images of passion and romance play, and as we watch, the world says, 'This is love.' God takes us to the foot of a tree on which a naked and bloodied man hangs and says, 'This is love.'"

Does that not bring you to tears? To think that we go on and play the fake game of love with the world, when God sent His only Son to show us what true love is? It's time to stop ignoring God!

In His death, He taught us that love is for the glory of God and the good of others - not the fulfillment of self. John 5:13 says, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

Christ also taught us it's NOT a feeling. Harris describes it like this, "(see Mark 14, where Jesus prays in the garden of Gethsemane) He clearly didn't feel like enduring the beatings, hanging on the cross, and enduring God's wrath for sin. But He submitted himself to His Father's will. Jesus' feelings were not the test of His love, nor were they His master."

We express true love in obedience to God and service to others - and we choose these behaviors.

Harris goes on to say, "[Clearly,] God's true love clashes with dating as we know it...When we extract the poison of self-love, our entire motivation in relationships is transformed...Our feelings can lie to us!"

Love must be sincere. God tells us this through Paul in Romans 12:9. This simply means genuine and earnest, not hypocritical. Josh told a story of the "schemes" of some guys he knew. He described it as a study in manipulation. They merely wanted to push emotional buttons [on girls] to get something for themselves. That doesn't sound like genuine love to me. And I certainly don't want anyone pushing my buttons!

There's a popular song in the contemporary Christian genre that says, "They will know we are Christians by our love...Love is patient, love is kind, never boasts, not full of pride, always hopes, always trusts, the evidence of Christ in us." How true.

The love we practice now prepares us for future relationships. Today we form patterns that we'll take with us into our marriage. Let that pattern by commitment based love! In saying this, dating as we know it today doesn't prepare us for marriage, it prepares us for divorce!

This doesn't mean we have to marry the first person we date. No, we have to wisely consider marriage, and be willing to obey God.

"True love waits, but not just for sex. It waits for the right time to commit to God's brand of love - unwavering, unflagging, and totally commited," says Harris.

Hopefully you realize the sanity of the book finally. We cannot love as God loves and date as the world dates.

Please, it would be my greatest joy, even if I don't know you, for you to take this into consideration and look out for your brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as being an example to the world.