Previous blogs to read first: Welcome, Too Much, Too Soon (1), Too Much Icing, Too Little Cake (2), DEFECT! (3), A Whole New World [er, Attitude] (4), and Looking Up "Love" In God's Dictionary (5), The Right Thing At The Wrong Time Is The Wrong Thing (6), Purity: A Direction, Not A Line (7), Put It Behind You (8), A Clean Slate (9), Just Friends in a Just-Do-It World (10), Guard Your Heart (11), Practice Makes Perfect (12) [See blog archive.]
Do you have an illusion of marriage?
Even as a teenager, I like to look at bridal magazines with my friends. We sometimes choose the dress we like best and pick out the prettiest engagement ring. We sit there dreaming about our big day.
Yes, it's fun. But marriage is not a perfect wedding. Marriage is a lifetime of commitment. A wedding is a time that marks the beginning of a journey of two people becoming one.
Do you think marriage will just be sex? Yes, that is a blessing God has placed in marriage, but it's more than that. Like I said, marriage is a lifetime of commitment, dedication, and devotion.
So, I dare to present to you the real and true unillusioned version of marriage. (Not that I have personal experience, but God's Word is clear on the topic.)
"Marriage is much more than a wedding ceremony," write Gary and Betsy Ricucci. "A wedding is an event, but a marriage is a state of being; it's a lifelong commitment to be developed and maintained."
Joshua Harris describes what our view of marriage should with four words: reverently, discreetly, advisedly, and soberly.
REVERENCE - A profound respect mingled with awe.
DISCRETION - Discernment or good judgment.
ADVISEDLY - To carefully consider.
SOBERLY - To be well-balanced, unaffected by passion, excitement, or prejudice.
In Gary and Betsy Ricucci's book, "Love that Lasts" they answer the question "What is marriage?" Here, I'll briefly describe the answer.
MARRIAGE IS THE FIRST INSTITUTION.
Genesis 2:22-24
"And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said,
'This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.'
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
MARRIAGE DEPICTS THE SUPERNATURAL UNION BETWEEN JESUS AND THE CHURCH.
Ephesians 5:31-32
"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church."
MARRIAGE IS THE EVENT GOD HAS SELECTED TO CONSUMMATE ALL OF TIME.
Revelation 19:7
"Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;"
MARRIAGE IS TO BE HELD IN HONOR.
Hebrews 13:4
"Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous."
MARRIAGE IS A REFINING PROCESS.
Harris says, "God wants to use the fire of marriage not only to comfort us, but also to refine and clease us from our selfishness and sin." He describes your spouse as a mirror. Once you get married, you will, through your spouse, see what's truly in your heart.
Harris leaves us with a poem called "A Woman's Question" by Lena Lathrop.
I encourage you to read it and think about it.
This section reminded me of a quote from the movie "27 Dresses."
Kevin says to Jane, "You want a wedding, not a marriage."
Do YOU simply want a wedding? Are you ready for the sack, but not the sacrifice?
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